I sit here typing this while listening to Taylor Swift’s “I can do it with a broken heart” in the background and I just smile.
First of all, it’s arguably one of her most relatable and boppy / can’t-not-sing-along songs on her new album, The Tortured Poets Department.
And FWIW it’s hard to type while I bounce in my seat and sing along…
But that’s not why I’m smiling.
I’m smiling because it came on at the moment I sat down to write this, and it could NOT be better timed
Because the very thing I’m here to write you about is the antithesis of the song’s premise.
In short, I’m writing about how I refuse, and I mean R-E-F-U-S-E, to participate in anything any longer that requires me to do it with a broken heart.
In case you missed it, I recently (3 months ago) published a 4-part blog series detailing the intimate experience of going through life with a smile on my face, and a broken heart underneath.
In that particular series, I grappled with the broken heart that comes with the ultimate betrayal.
I could argue that I did it with a broken heart for far longer than the timeline listed in that blog series, for far more reasons than the blog series details.
I could also argue that so many of us (maybe even you) find ourselves doing that on a daily basis.
We are fed the lie that our value comes from our roles and contributions — whether those contributions come in the form of your work, your roles as a parent and/or caregiver, or your financial contribution.
And, I’m here to make a statement. A declaration. That I’m no longer doing that.
There is no valor in pretending or performing so that everyone else feels comfortable in your presence.
There is no glory in continuing on with something that no longer fits my desires, no matter how many degrees or certifications I have, no matter how much money I’ve made or sunken into that world.
In short, I’m here to declare that the Era I’ve been in as an entrepreneur – my “marketing/business coach/PT/teen expert era” – is coming to a close.
I have been so grateful to have landed in this Era for 15 years. I have seen the online and offline business world completely evolve via a pandemic.
I have had the privilege of guiding so many brilliant people to not only grow incredibly masterful businesses that serve thousands of people, or to build their expertise in the teen health arena, or to heal from any number of injuries or pains…
…but also to grow incredibly masterful at finding their deepest, truest versions of themselves in the process.
If you’ve been a part of this Era as a client, thank you for allowing me into your corner of the world. It has been such an honor to witness you.
If you’ve been in this Era as a colleague or mentor, I’m grateful for all of your support and guidance.
If you’ve been a part of this Era from afar — secretly or not so secretly cheering me on — I want you to know your energy is felt.
And if you’ve been a part of this Era as someone who has brought or taught me a lesson — even when (and especially when) that lesson is painful — I thank you.
As TS says in a different song from the same album “There wouldn’t be this if there hadn’t been you.”
So you may be wondering “Well, you’re writing this … which means you must also be announcing what’s next, right?!”
You’re not wrong to think that. It does seem to match the cadence and tone of my writing.
Alas, I am not coming at you with a huge announcement or launch of “what’s next.”
I did announce a new coaching program, SISter, in my recent blog series.
And that program still exists. It’s a beautiful private coaching container full of deep, beautiful, transformative support for you. If you desire private support from me, and you feel it’s time — just reach out and let me know.
AND, there is something else that is currently gestating.
Actually, a couple of epic somethings are brewing.
It’s not time to announce the details of those yet.
But what I can say – is that — if you know me at all — you’ll probably say “Damn, what took you so long?”
So, going against the advice of most of the loud-mouthed marketing gurus out there, I’m writing this post to <gasp!> basically announce nothing.
So why even bother writing this?
Because you and I were raised in a world – especially an online marketing world – that tells us that if our career aspirations are not tied up in a beautiful package with a perfect bow, then they should not be presented to the world.
In other words, you should ALWAYS be able to give a 20 second pitch that describes exactly what you are doing and how valuable your contribution is to mankind, and do so with a perfect smile on your face.
To that, I say bullshit. Because most of the time, none of us know what we’re doing.
And even if you do, trying to sum that up in 20 seconds is damn near impossible. You know it, I know it.
And yet, we think we need that “perfect bow” or that “rigid box” to feel complete. To feel enough. To belong. To be safe.
And if you don’t have that, you’re at best flighty and inconsistent, and at worst a failure to society.
Don’t believe me? Just ask the sweaty armpit stains on the shirt I wore this weekend.
I had just stumbled through a racing heart and high-pitched voice trying my best to explain my next venture when a good friend asked me this weekend over coffee what I was pivoting into…
Yes, me.
Yes the person who is SO GOOD WITH WORDS.
Yes the person who loves to help YOU put words around who you are, what your purpose is, and what your story is.
I am actually completely head-over-heels SMITTEN with what is coming next for me. I am OVER THE DAMN MOON to eventually reveal it to you, too.
In fact, once I spend 5-10 minutes stumbling through it when someone asks, I eventually feel really clear on it.
But my soul has not given me the green light to tell you yet. Because I need to give my current Era a proper send-off.
And what I will NOT be doing any longer, is taking on things in my career that require me to do it with a broken heart.
So I’m here to invite you into the messy middle with me. Come swim with me in the gray, amorphous pool.
And consider this your permission slip to get cozy in your own messy middle – whether it’s about your career, an action you need to take (or not take) with a family member or friend, a trip you need to decide to take (or not), a health issue, or something else entirely.
If it doesn’t feel resolved and perfectly tied up with a bow – welcome. Let’s go swimming.
And in the meantime, if any little part of you is feeling like “DANG, I wanted to work with you on my business/marketing/teen expertise, did I miss my chance?”
No, you definitely did not.
There will be one last chance to get in on that as part of my “Send-Off Party”.
So stay tuned to this space this week, because things are about to heat up here in the messy middle, just in time for the summer solstice!
Not doing it with a broken heart,
Julie
Comentarios